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Royal Nursery Diary – Week 4: Paging Mr Sand-Man

It is three in the morning, and all through the house,
Not a peep, not a sound… not even a mouse.
Ahhhhhhhh… Prithee… Why can’t it be so?
For the Sand-Man, little one, is a friend, not a foe…

photo credit: Christine ™ via photopin cc

photo credit: Christine ™ via photopin cc

Sleepus interruptus.
The little red starfish beckons… His screams shatter the silence of the night. Through the open window, a light breeze and the drone of a plane, now that flights have resumed overhead… The shrill cries rouse The Duchess of Cambridge from her light sleep. Did she not just nurse him a short while ago?

Three weeks old and, already, little Prince George asserts himself as his mother’s keeper… While the cat is away, the mice will play, and indeed, Daddy is nowhere in sight, having resumed his post in Anglesey last Wednesday. Let’s put Mummy to the test, and see if she can read “cry language“: low-pitched accompanied by sucking for hunger… Soft and intermittent for “ennui”… Continuous whine for over-tiredness and discomfort… The difference is not lost on Catherine, however, whose competence grows with every passing day.

As for any British child, the end of this week will mark the end of the midwives’ home visits. According to an article in the Telegraph that Ed (Perkins, Press Secretary) included in the Duchess’ press clippings one morning, “(Prince George’s) progress will be entered into the same red-covered personal child health record book that is given to every baby, and for the next five years the Duchess will be offered help from her local health visitor.” Could she confirm if George has colic? Maybe she could recommend a few tips to bring on the Sand-Man?

photo credit: abardwell via photopin cc

photo credit: abardwell via photopin cc

Catherine makes flight patterns with the pacifier above her little boy’s head… Georgie can now follow it with his eyes before sucking on it ravenously as if his life depended on it. According to the books, pacifiers prevent SIDS after all… Smart boy. As she gently caresses his soft forehead, the Duchess is ecstatic to realize that, by some miracle, George is asleep. The Sand-Man need not be summoned again… Catherine is fast asleep,as soon as her head touches the pillow. Exhaustion has officially set in.

Baby gifts galore
Morning waits for no one, however… not even for weary royal mums with a mountain of correspondence to tackle, like the one Rebecca (Deacon, the Duchess’ Private Secretary) sent just yesterday. Prince George has received so many gifts, and they each deserve a note of gratitude…

There’s the baby crocodile named George from Australia’s Northern Territory, the newborn care package and condoms from Finland, baby-sized Kanye skinny jeans and hoodies from Kanye and Kim…

Catherine’s Uncle Gary assembled a time capsule containing “a DVD of Andy Murray winning Wimbledon and a copy of Hello magazine.”

There’s the formal hat, shirt and tie from Israel, the baby carrier backpack from the Scouts, a stuffed toy bilby from Australia, and the monogrammed, 18-carat white gold Sudocrem charm bracelet designed by Theo Fennell…

Asda supermarket gave Georgie a VIP parking spot near Anglesey, and he has his very own VIP seating at the Greene King Pub the Fort St George in Cambridge.

Where to begin? Rebecca’s brilliant organizational skills have it covered… She has become an esteemed companion for Catherine, just as Prince William had hoped, as the two young women settle into their roles together.

A little “me” time for Mummy
While George is still sleeping, the Duchess steals a quick moment to get back into a streamlined version of her daily regimen… Who knew that pregnancy could bring about cellulite? After a short, sixty-second shower, a quick application of Karin Herzog‘s skin-slimming Dynamic Duo is in order, just in case.

Her shimmering mane has suddenly taken to suffocating the drain with its falling hair… “Another postpartum surprise,” she realizes, as she reaches for the Shu Uemura Essence Absolue Nourishing Protective Oil that Rossano (Ferretti, her former hairstylist) once prescribed for her.

Catherine then gathers her hair into a loose ponytail before tackling yet another battle scar of pregnancy: dry, less elastic skin and the dark pigmentation of melasma. Lancôme, her favourite makeup company, recently added her to a short list of celebrities given the small task of sampling DreamTone, their latest seaweed anti-aging serum, a skin discoloration fix she is eager to put to the test.

photo credit: dsevilla via photopin cc

photo credit: dsevilla via photopin cc

After slipping on one of the more casual Seraphine dresses that arrived last week, the bag-eyed duchess heads to the kitchen for a cup of java… Maybe she could take George and Lupo for a walk this afternoon. Fresh air will do her some good, and she is itching to resume some form of exercise. Maybe some tennis with Dad later? James might be coming with his and girlfriend Donna’s new cocker spaniel puppy… Lupo will be thrilled!

The oasis of home
Catherine’s single mom days have been long without William taking the night shifts, but her parents’ support has been invaluable. In fact, Mrs Middleton is turning out to be a true baby whisperer. She is the only one who seems to be able to put little George to sleep. What a comfort this place is to both Catherine and William… In this oasis of love and normalcy, Catherine wishes she could cocoon there with William and George for a little while longer…

Soon, she and George will most likely be making the 270 mile journey to North Wales one last time to help William pack up the cottage before vacationing at Balmoral together. Hopefully, her parents will accept Her Majesty’s invitation and join them there… A girl needs her mum in these crucial months, and now that colic appears to be setting in, the Middletons’ presence will bring constancy and familiarity in the little boy’s life…

photo credit: amysept via photopin cc

photo credit: amysept via photopin cc

Missing her Prince
In the meantime, Catherine misses her husband… When he calls tonight, she must remember to try and pin him down on the godparents issue. Arrangements are being made, and it is so difficult to discuss such things over the phone… This afternoon, she was hoping to sift through some more of George’s baby photos, and perhaps take a few more for the album. If they cannot settle on enough pictures, they will have no choice but to bring in one of William’s favourite photographers… Hopefully, that will be a last resort for Georgie’s sake.

The Duchess of Cornwall called while Catherine was napping… Camilla is quite excited about the nursery preparations being made at Kensington, and the cream-coloured Beatrix Potter nursery is coming along nicely, despite “the old grey men” at the Palace insisting that antiques would be more appropriate for the future king of England. No bother… Camilla has enlisted herself as Catherine’s defender. She has Catherine’s back.

This third week has proven to be a rather taxing one for the Duchess of Cambridge… The sleep deprivation, the novelty of becoming a mother, and a temporarily single one at that, the hormone-induced baby blues, the stress of relocating to Kensington Palace and Anmer Hall, the anxiety over leaving this comfortable oasis of security and familiarity for Anglesey, for Balmoral, for Australia have all taken their toll on the new mother. How disruptive will this all be on the little Prince for whom routine is crucial in curbing colic?

And to top it off, Jamie Lowther-Pinkerton, the couple’s esteemed and loyal principal private secretary will be leaving them for the private sector next month (though he will remain one day a week for support and advice.) Maybe William could use his wiles and convince Nanny Jessie (Webb, Prince William’s elderly former nanny) to lend an experienced pair of hands where Georgie is concerned. Catherine realizes that her parents do have a business to run, and she will not be able to hide at Middleton Manor forever. But she really could use another experienced person to provide comfort and consistency for George when she is off on royal engagements.

… But there is light at the end of the tunnel… Her Prince will try to be home this weekend.

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